Baby Vanessa was adopted by Stacey Doss at birth and now the birthfather is contesting the adoption. Vanessa was to be returned to Ohio from her home with Stacey Doss in California but Doss managed to get a temporary emergency stay order so her daughter would not be placed in foster care in Ohio while the battle over custody ensues.

The birthfather, an unsavory character who has spent time in prison for domestic violence and also has an open case of child endangerment filed against him (he has four other biological children but has custody of none), apparently was harassing Vanessa’s birthmother, Andrea Conley at a bus stop. Conley supports the adoption of her daughter Vanessa by Stacey Doss and has filed a petition for a domestic violence civil protection order against Benjamin Mills, Jr.

My daughter and I have just returned from a trip to Guatemala. It was a wonderful experience for both of us. We were part of a group from my friend Pam’s church and her daughter Maria, also adopted from Guatemala, came along as well. Ella and Maria are good friends so they had each other for companionship and had a great deal of fun together. I had counted on their having each other a positive way for Ella to return to Guatemala for the first time, and fortunately I was correct.

Ella loved Guatemala and told everyone she met that she was born there. She consistently used the few Spanish words she knew and picked up many more. We spent a full day with 100 children from the new government run orphanage “Hogar Solidarios” that incorporated 4 separate and run down government orphanages in Guatemala City into one orphan village, and took the children to the zoo. Ella was perfectly comfortable playing with these children and enjoyed herself immensely.

Aiden … its meaning is " fire" - Think Baby Names

The baby name Aiden (also spelled Aidan) is of Gaelic origin. Both spellings of the baby name are in the Top Ten baby names for twins (with Addison and Nadia).

The baby name Aiden is a new addition to the charts with both spellings. Spelled with an “e,” the baby name first appeared on the charts in 1995 and broke into the Top 100 in 2003. In 2009, the baby name Aiden ranked #12. The baby name Aidan has a similar history, first appearing on the charts in 1990 and then breaking into the Top 100 in 2001. In 2009, the baby name Aidan ranked #72. See Popular Baby Names.

A reader wants to know how to protect his adopted children from their abusive biological mother. The focus of the blog entry is limited to abusive biological birth parents and should not be applied to situations that do not involve some form of abuse.

The best way to protect your adopted children from their abusive biological mother is to cut off all contact with her. Do not agree to an open adoption. (I understand that some social workers try to “force” these agreements as part of the adoption. Don’t agree to it.) Change your phone to an unlisted number. Move away if you have to. Do whatever you have to do to keep your adopted children safe.

While some people might not be supportive of your decision, anyone who understands trauma knows that severing all ties with an abuser is best for the child. For whatever reason, Western culture purports that maintaining contact between a mother and her child is always in the child’s best interest. That is a lie, and I know this firsthand.

Dear Adoption Maharishi,

I am really bothered by the fact that adult adoptees are denied access to their original birth certificates in many states. I can think of no other group of people who are categorically denied access to their own records without having any say. How can this practice comply with the equal protection clause of the 14th amendment?

~ Frustrated