If there is anything predictable about inter-country adoptions, it is that at some point while you are in process, there will be a catastrophe. Or, more precisely, something that looks for all the world like a catastrophe that will put an end to your adoption plans. Mostly they don't, but surviving the weeks or months until the disaster is repaired will take every ounce of strength you have--and then some. 

China, Russia, Ethiopia, Guatemala, Viet Nam, India--take your pick. In the almost 10 years that I have spent in and around the world of inter-country adoptions I have seen every country roiled by one misfortune or another. 

Lately, it has been the turn of Kazakhstan, South Korea and Russia. Paperwork problems in the case of Kaz and sadly again, the deaths of children adopted by Americans in the case of the latter two. 

On March 13, an American woman in Utah, Kimberly Emelyantsev, was arrested on suspicion that she murdered a child that she and her husband, a Russian national, had adopted from Russia. A second child adopted by the couple was hospitalized with malnourishment and dehydration. Within days, there were posts on adoption chat boards that Russian regions were closing because of the Emelyantsev case. While that has turned out to have not been the case (except possibly one region not even connected to the Emelyantsev case), it made for some high anxiety. 

So what do you do when of these firestorms hits your country? Take a clue from the firefighters who battled last year's wildfires in southern California: Get out of the way. Yes, I know most of you are not in-country when these things happen. But you have to remove yourself, physically or mentally to a location where you can regain your serenity. My second adoption occurred during the deaths of three Russian-born children at the hands of American parents (Hilt, Pavlis and Matthey), and I wound up spending a lot of time in my gardens. 

You also need to stay in touch with your agency, even though it may not have a solution or even complete information. (If you feel as if you "can't trust" your agency, you shouldn't be working with them.) I can tell you, from 25 years in journalism, that it can be notoriously hard to get all the facts on a story, even from people who are on the front lines of its unfolding. Theories and opinions will get aired as fact. Folks who just want their 10 seconds of fame will be touted as informed sources. 

Southern California is calm now, and Russia, Kazakhstan, South Korea and whatever country will be next to erupt will soon be calm, too. A child is counting on your composure.