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cover of Allies in Healing: When the Person You Love Was Sexually Abused as a Child
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Recent blog posts

  • Who Has the “Power” in Adoption?
  • Older Adoptive Parenting: Introducing “Forgetful”, yet Another of the Seven Dwarfs of Menopause
  • How Can a Foster Parent Discipline a Foster Child
  • Michael Savage.. Autism Due to Bad Fathering
  • Trauma Tuesday: Traumatized Adopted Child Triggered by Location
  • Helping you Decide What Movies Your Adopted Child Should be Allowed to View
  • Why Can’t Foster Parents Use Corporal Punishment
  • Another Adoption Agency Bites the Dust
  • Medicating the ADHD Adopted Child for Summer Camp
  • Which Foster Child Behaviors Are You Willing to Take On?
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  • Military Family Posted In Germany Adopts From Foster Care
  • Adoptees Mental Health OK, But Parents May Be Crazy
  • John Barrowman (Science Fiction Star) Wants to Adopt
  • Black Woman Thinking About Adopting White Child
  • Judith Leekin Guilty of Adoption Fraud, Gets 11 Years
  • Alleged Embezzlement - Stole $500,000 from Foster Care
  • Katie Price and Peter André Adopting
  • Doesn't Believe in International Adoption
  • Adoption Nightmare: An Interview with Dawn DeLorenzo, Part I
  • Russia Banned American Adoption Agencies (not related to recent dead child)

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Adoptive family

Michael Savage.. Autism Due to Bad Fathering

Submitted by AngelaW on Tue, 07/22/2008 - 14:38.
  • Adoptive family
  • Adoptive parenting
  • Autism
  • Be Counted
  • Birth fathers
  • Birth parents
  • Hold Michael Savage Accountable
  • Michael Savage
  • Special needs


Michael Savage has a national radio show. During a July 16, 2008 show (you can listen to above) he called Autism a "fraud" and "racket". He called children with autism "moron", "brat", and "idiots". He claimed that fathers just weren't doing their job. He said:

  • AngelaW's blog
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Which Foster Child Behaviors Are You Willing to Take On?

Submitted by FosterMommy on Mon, 07/21/2008 - 02:59.
  • Adoption disruption
  • Adoptive family
  • Adoptive parenting
  • Children's Issues
  • FAS
  • Foster adoption
  • Foster care
  • foster parent discipline
  • Older child adoption
  • Severe behaviors
  • Single parents
  • Special needs
  • Teens
  • Traumatized children
  • Tweens

Has the severity of foster child behaviors been increasing over the years? Some people, including teachers, foster parents, and workers believe that it has. There are those who attribute the increased violence to television and video games.

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Birds of a Feather Flock Together and so Do Foster Children

Submitted by FosterMommy on Mon, 07/21/2008 - 02:08.
  • Adoptees
  • Adoptive family
  • Adoptive parenting
  • Bird of a Feather
  • Children's Issues
  • Foster adoption
  • Foster care
  • Friends of Foster Children
  • Older child adoption
  • Talking about adoption
  • Teens
  • Traumatized children
  • Tweens

 

You know the old saying “Birds of a feather flock together,” and so foster child seem instinctively to find each other. Over the years, teenager girls have come and gone. They usually made friends, some more than others did of course. I have always made a point of meeting friends and asking questions. Inevitably, the friends are somehow affected by foster care or adoption. Some are adopted through foster care, part of a foster family, foster child, or they should be. My children always seem surprised when they discover that their new friend is somehow associated with foster care. Over the years, I have realized the truth of the phrase, “Birds of a feather flock together.” Foster children are able to find each other almost intuitively.

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It's Vacation Time!

Submitted by JulieC on Sun, 07/20/2008 - 04:15.
  • Adoptive family
  • Adoptive grandparents
  • Adoptive parenting
  • beach
  • boding
  • family bonding
  • quality time
  • road trip
  • Vacation

Every year I try to take the boys on a road trip without their dad. It’s not that my wonderful husband is no fun to travel with, it is just that I enjoy getting to sneak away with them for a few days and get in some mommy and sons bonding time. There are so many special things that fathers and sons can do together, all that manly stuff that simply leaves me scratching my womanly head, so this is our special thing.

This year I am taking them up to the beach that I used to go to when I was my oldest son’s age. Neither of them have been to a beach with a boardwalk before, so I am quite excited to take them to one that is known for it’s boardwalk, as well as one that I have so many fond memories of as a young girl.

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Hump Day Hippie: Recycling Your Child's Artwork

Submitted by JulieC on Wed, 07/16/2008 - 23:08.
  • Adoptive family
  • Adoptive parenting
  • environmentally friendly
  • environmentally friendly crafts for kids
  • Going Green
  • hump day hippie
  • Recycling
  • repurposed paper
  • reusing
  • teaching kids to go green
  • wrapping paper
  • wrapping paper alternatives

So it is pretty much a given that if you have children, you have a stash somewhere in your home, but usually the refrigerator, that is packed full of artwork that your child has created. We all love them, but there comes a time when there simply is no longer enough space for everything that your child has made, yet tossing it into the trash just isn’t an option. So what is a parent to do when faced with such a dire situation? Recycle!

Children’s art works great as wrapping paper!

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Dear Adoption Maharishi: Who Has Rights To My Adopted Child If I Die?

Submitted by Adoption_Maharishi on Wed, 07/16/2008 - 21:24.
  • Adoptive family
  • Adoptive parent health
  • Adoptive parenting
  • adoptive parents die
  • Birth mothers
  • Birth parents
  • child custody
  • death of parents
  • guardianship
  • legal guardian
  • Older Parents
  • parental rights
  • rights to child
  • TPR

Dear Adoption Maharishi,

 

During the last visit with our daughter’s bmom we (I and her alone while dh and daughter were in the car) told her that we had decided to name my brother and his wife as our daughter’s guardians if something ever were to happen to dh and I. I thought she'd be happy, but she got really mad, totally flipped out and said that if something were to happen to us that SHE would get our daughter back, and have the power to decide who would raise her! This can't really be true, can it? We want her to still be able to get letters, pictures and visits just like she does now, which my brother and sister-in-law have already agreed to do (they are like us and believe that it is in the best interest of our daughter to know where she came from), but she and her family have on and off again trouble with the law and substance abuse issues and we are not comfortable with any of them having custody, that is why we all agreed to this adoption in the first place!

--Uneasy Mommy

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Advice From Adult Adoptee: Communication, Love, and Honesty

Submitted by FaithA on Wed, 07/16/2008 - 12:45.
  • adopted child
  • Adoptees
  • Adoptive family
  • being honest with adopted child
  • Talking about adoption
  • talking with adopted child about adoption

Boy in baseball cap (c) Lynda BernhardtI recently talked with an adult adoptee about adoption. I asked this young woman if she had any advice for me as an adoptive mother. She said that her most important advice is to keep the lines of communication open so that my adopted child feels free to talk with me about his adoption. Adopted children need to feel free to ask questions about their adoption as they have them.

Her second most important piece of advice was to give your adopted child plenty of love. She said that as long as you have communication and love in your relationship with your adopted child, then you provide the foundation for the other pieces to fall into place.

Number three on her list was honesty.

  • FaithA's blog
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Firewall Against Homosexuals

Submitted by AngelaW on Wed, 07/09/2008 - 05:19.
  • abuse
  • Adoptive family
  • adoptive father
  • Brad Pitt
  • Celebrity Adoption
  • Charlie Rose
  • Gay families
  • Single parents
  • Traumatized children
  • youtube


The recent give and take on the various blogs about gay adoption... Jesus Said, “Love the Sinner, Hate the Sin.” and Discrimination is not Just a Word reminded me of a fairly recent Brad Pitt interview from 2007.

  • AngelaW's blog
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Who is Suitable to Raise an Adopted Child?

Submitted by LisaS on Thu, 07/03/2008 - 12:23.
  • Adoptive family
  • discrimination in adoption
  • Gay families
  • Single parents

In Julie’s recent blog, the issue of Adoption Media LLC not allowing singles and gay couples to advertise on their website was brought to light. It is not only on that website that you will find this type of discrimination; there are adoption agencies, states in the U.S. and countries that will not allow singles and gay couples to adopt.

My issue with this discrimination is that it has absolutely nothing to do with a person’s ability to be a good parent. A person’s sexual persuasion does not dictate their parenting skills. Heterosexual couples certainly don’t have a monopoly on good parenting.

  • LisaS's blog
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Pressure to Breastfeed the Adopted Child

Submitted by FaithA on Wed, 07/02/2008 - 12:03.
  • adopted child
  • adoptive breastfeeding
  • Adoptive family
  • breastfeeding the adopted child

Dirt Road (c) Lynda BernhardtWhen I was waiting to adopt a child, I read a ton of parenting books. I did not know a thing about parenting a child, so I wanted to read everything I could get my hands on so I would have some inkling of what I was doing.

Because I was in the process of adopting an infant, I mostly read books about taking care of a baby during the first year of life. I also read magazines geared toward new mothers. Whenever I read these resources, I was bombarded by messages about breastfeeding my baby.

Most parenting resources that I found pushed breastfeeding in multiple places. These articles would tell me that breastfeeding would result in a healthier baby with a stronger immune system who was smarter. “Breast is best” messages were woven into just about everything I read. There was only one little problem – As an adoptive mother-to-be, I was not lactating and probably never would.

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