Today’s Guestblogger, Juanita, has been one of my adult daughter’s friends since high school. When Juanita was 15 years old, she discovered she was pregnant. Well, she discovered it when her mom took her to an OBGYN for a pregnancy test. Her mother then insisted that she have an abortion. She threatened to tell Juanita’s father if she refused to go through with it. Juanita was emotionally immature, looking for love and acceptance and she never considered that she might get pregnant. She didn’t know what else to do, so she obeyed her mother who set everything up. Honestly, there wasn’t anyway that Juanita could have parented a child back then. She cried throughout the ordeal and for years to come.  

For at least 20 years, I dealt with self-blame and regret for my actions. Ultimately, the choice was mine and I had to sign for the procedure. But, I didn’t know what else to do, I was only 15. No one suggested adoption and I didn’t think that far ahead. I cried myself to sleep for years over it. I felt that God could never forgive me for committing murder, one of the Ten Commandments. I lived with shame and regret and begged for God’s forgiveness every night when I said prayers.